No, Thank You!

Won’t be long and I’ll be heading into my 74th year. If I read all the problems they say are waiting for us as we age, there doesn’t seem to be any good news.

There are cardiovascular issues, bones, joints and muscles start crapping out, your digestion gets problematic, vision, urinary, memory, weight, libido, (Where’s the gun?) and depression.

Actually, I was cooked at 70. If I opened my medicine cabinet without my glasses, I would see one big orange blur.

The only things that would fit me was sweats. Someone actually called me on my black sweat pants with a double breasted jacket and tie once.

Everything hurt, my back went out more than I did, my blood pressure and triglycerides were setting records, and I never left the doctor’s office without a new prescription.

I kept my trophy-sized kidney stones on the mantle and my doctor would always thank me profusely for putting her kids through college.

I had to be detoxed off of alcohol, xanax, muscle relaxers, pain killers and multiple sleep medications. In a ward, of course, for that added level of humiliation.

That was 45 pounds and 10 pairs of sneakers ago. It all comes back once you start to move it around. No matter what age you are. I know.

There isn’t a drug on the planet that makes me feel as good as when I move my body, stress my muscles, steady my mind and feed my human movement system the nutrients it needs.

Yes, the future’s uncertain, but to go into it unprepared, is a fate worse than, well, you know.

So, if it’s all the same, I’ll pass on the pain and misery.

You should too.


Please note: I welcome comments that are offensive, illogical or off-topic from readers in all states of consciousness.

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